deadgodjess:

gaslightgallows:

eliciaforever:

mysticmiind:

eliciaforever:

Fun fact: Crisco was such a commonly used lube by gay men in the 70s that there was an entire ballroom scene nightclub called the Crisco Disco in New York City which had a DJ booth constructed out of a giant Crisco container.

I’m just wondering if it was actually safe to use as lube…..

It absolutely is! Crisco is a vegetable oil, which means it’s safe to use, even with condoms (whereas baby oil and petroleum jelly destroys latex and can cause irritation and infection).

And it’s kosher!

This looks like the pitch for the most progressive crisco ad ever and frankly win.

jackharknessday:

weavemama:

DO NOT SUPPORT SALVATION ARMY 

I can back this up. It isn’t only their shelters.

I have a family friend who worked at our local Salvation Army headquarters as a a secretary. This particular office took all the Christmas donations for children in need, put them in a warehouse, and on a designated day the staff and their friends picked through them all, taking whatever they wanted. She saw people hauling away bikes donated for specific families. Some local children had hundreds of dollars of gifts donated in their name, and on Christmas they received three cheap things, items likely not even from the person who sponsored them.

My friend quit, and I’ve not given them a dime of my money since then.

Do not give to the Salvation Army.

chally-wally:

dawnofthebadpuns:

5000angryspiders:

oddpyromaniac:

incubchii:

oddpyromaniac:

sorry:

sleepy-loopin:

bakabon-no-papa:

bakabon-no-papa:

bakabon-no-papa:

i found a christian retelling of the first harry potter book and it claims that birthdays are unholy and are made up

some highlights

• Ron is a Slytherin
  
• Draco is a Ravenclaw AND a mysogonist
  
• Snape isn’t a cunt and is really nice and caring towards Harry
  
• Angels have replaced owls
  
• Dean Thomas is a main character for no reason
  
• Dumbledore isn’t gay and is married to a woman and is ALSO Hermionies dad
  
• It doesn’t take place in the UK for some reason
  
• Wizard duels are now called pray-offs

I’ll add more when i read more

more

• Harry converts Draco into being a Gryffindor (who are depicted as pitch perfect Christians who follow the bible closely and only take orders from God)
  
• Eco friendly-ness is bad apparently
  
• Voldemort has hair
  
• Believing in evolution is apparently Satanic
  
• Voldemort wanted to make Christianity ILLEGAL
  
• Voldemort ALSO has a Reddit account
  
• Dumbledore calls Reddit a “godless coven”
  
• THEY LITERALLY TRY AND CONVERT VOLDEMORT INTO BEING A CHRISTIAN
  
• Harry says that Voldemort has been tricked by the lies of society and that he deserves to burn in hell 
  
• ““I’m just so upset that you don’t accept the Bible,” Hermionie sobbed femininely. “The Bible is the best book ever. Why can’t you respect that?”“
  
• Voldemort is described as a fornicating, drug-addicted evolutionist (Actually, this is what the author says that all Evolutionists are like this)
  

I can’t believe i found a fic to rival My Immortal

This is some anti My Immortal shit

how does one sob femininely? 

PLEASE SOMEONE SEND ME A NAME OR A LINK TO THIS

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10644439/1/Hogwarts-School-of-Prayer-and-Miracles

I love you thank you

Dumbledore is married to McGonagall.

There are several paragraphs describing beloved fictional characters’ chest hair.

Slytherins are Catholics.

Petunia wears pant suits.

“Aunt Petunia smacked her hands over Harry’s young ears; and her voice was sickly sweet when she said, “Thank you very much for your concern, sir, but he does not need your religion, he has science and socialism and birthdays. “

Reblog if you don’t need religion because you have science socialism and birthdays

warmpockets:

warmpockets:

i’m watching an art theft documentary and they’re interviewing this art history professor from new york who was asked to go with the fbi to authenticate a rubens that had been stolen but it was a sting operation so they had to pretend like they weren’t the fbi, that they were some private buyer about to pay $3.5 million for it, and the fbi was like “this is a VERY delicate operation because you never know how they will react to what you have to say so let the agent do all of the talking, don’t say a word to anyone just nod if it’s the rubens, the last operation we did the guy in your position got shot because things went wrong in a second” and then it cuts to the professor’s interview and he says “i wasn’t going to fly down to miami to be a part of an undercover fbi sting operation to handle what could be rubens’s aurora and just NOT say anything. i was gonna have to ad lib a little” and then he tells the interviewer that when he & the fbi agent got to the hotel while he was examining the painting he started lecturing the other people, first on how badly they had wrapped it, and then about like how it had been painted, the history of it, what the subject was and what she was doing, etc etc, and he was like “i hadn’t taught a class on rubens in 15 years, so for me it was like being back in the classroom except my students couldn’t leave” 

at one point during the deal the professor turned to the woman selling it and he said “isn’t this just the most beautiful rubens you’ve ever seen outside of a museum?” (because the fbi had told him earlier that this piece had been stolen from a museum) and THEN he said “where on earth did you get it from?” and the group of people the woman had with her was like taxidermy-fox.png but the woman was like “inheritance” can you IMAGINE the fbi agent about to have a fucking aneurysm when this random guy you’ve brought in just to nod if it’s the right painting not only starts giving an impromptu lecture but then he asks how they got it

queerwatsons:

me: im begging u i need to study

my brain: did you hear the word? whAT’s the word? hE’s a-coming. wHO’s a-coming? paUL’s a-coming. PAUL’S A-coming??

tomatomagica:

this will happen to you if you sexualize minors

dailydungeondelves:

It’s hard to replace something so awesome…

somerandompokemon:

unfortunatelysirius:

sweetmadameblue:

theouijagirl:

kerplunkers:

hypo-thermic:

yogaboi:

toocooltobehipster:

To donate £5 to the charity supporting the male victims of domestic abuse, text the message: MKDV46 to 70070

Click here to watch the video

At first I though this was a joke

Don’t ignore this Tumblr

Yet they still do even when it’s right in their face.

This reminds me of how a friend of mine was abused by the mother of his child. She was mentally unstable and used to berate him constantly and would smack him in the head all the time. It really pissed me off. Then one night she threw hot coffee in his face and tried to stab him with a screwdriver. The cops hauled him off to jail because she made up a sob story that painted herself as the victim. 

Once he left her, he stayed with me and it was a nightmare. She stalked him and me. She would drive by my house obsessively at all hours of the day and night (her muffler made a weird sound so I know it was her). She started showing up at my job, showing up at the places I frequented around town, and filling up my voicemail with dead air. The cops were no help.

One day she got bold enough to talk her way into my home by conning my elderly grandmother, whom I was taking care of, while I was out. She went in my room and went through my stuff (creepy), then found him napping on the couch and attacked him. My grandmother witnessed the whole thing. He grabbed her by the arms, forced her out the front door, and locked it. The cops were called again. They said they’d go and ‘talk’ to her.

The next day we were watching a movie and there was a knock at the door. The police had come to arrest him. She filed a complaint against him and shown off some bruises on her arms from the altercation that she swore were completely unprovoked. My grandmother saw the whole thing since she was in the living room too and testified on his behalf. He still ended up serving jail time.
No one takes male domestic violence victims seriously. They only see males as perpetrators.

#standing up for male victims takes NOTHING away from female victims #this isn’t an either/or scenario #you can pursue justice for male victims and still be 100% feminist #safer world for EVERYONE 

This is important. Just… everyone needs to see this.

No one should suffer abuse. But when I look at this I see that men are taking this abuse as well. And no one is helping. To anyone who thinks that’s a joke, stop thinking so or- get out. OUT.

littlemonarch:

baker-p-i:

pseudo-seraphim:

somewhere-inthe-deepdetails:

nikadd:

a-them-fatale:

laughconfetti:

proto-homo:

xelamanrique318:

SNL - Cut for Time: My Little Step Children

WHY WOULD THEY CUT THIS?????

This is legiterally the funniest thing snl has done in decades

they cut it because of the ONE gay reference

Same energy

both of these sketches were written by julio torres - here’s his twitter

Omg 😂

I just want you all to know that my dramatic 6 year old ass would have loved all of this shit.

I’m the dramatique™ hand to face moment in the broken mirror.

“YOU HAVE EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING IS FOR YOU. AND THIS ONE THING IS FOR HIM.”

I don’t know Julio Torres nor his sexual orientation but no matter what it is he has lived The Queer Experience™ .

deadgodjess:

gaslightgallows:

eliciaforever:

mysticmiind:

eliciaforever:

Fun fact: Crisco was such a commonly used lube by gay men in the 70s that there was an entire ballroom scene nightclub called the Crisco Disco in New York City which had a DJ booth constructed out of a giant Crisco container.

I’m just wondering if it was actually safe to use as lube…..

It absolutely is! Crisco is a vegetable oil, which means it’s safe to use, even with condoms (whereas baby oil and petroleum jelly destroys latex and can cause irritation and infection).

And it’s kosher!

This looks like the pitch for the most progressive crisco ad ever and frankly win.

jackharknessday:

weavemama:

DO NOT SUPPORT SALVATION ARMY 

I can back this up. It isn’t only their shelters.

I have a family friend who worked at our local Salvation Army headquarters as a a secretary. This particular office took all the Christmas donations for children in need, put them in a warehouse, and on a designated day the staff and their friends picked through them all, taking whatever they wanted. She saw people hauling away bikes donated for specific families. Some local children had hundreds of dollars of gifts donated in their name, and on Christmas they received three cheap things, items likely not even from the person who sponsored them.

My friend quit, and I’ve not given them a dime of my money since then.

Do not give to the Salvation Army.

chally-wally:

dawnofthebadpuns:

5000angryspiders:

oddpyromaniac:

incubchii:

oddpyromaniac:

sorry:

sleepy-loopin:

bakabon-no-papa:

bakabon-no-papa:

bakabon-no-papa:

i found a christian retelling of the first harry potter book and it claims that birthdays are unholy and are made up

some highlights

• Ron is a Slytherin
  
• Draco is a Ravenclaw AND a mysogonist
  
• Snape isn’t a cunt and is really nice and caring towards Harry
  
• Angels have replaced owls
  
• Dean Thomas is a main character for no reason
  
• Dumbledore isn’t gay and is married to a woman and is ALSO Hermionies dad
  
• It doesn’t take place in the UK for some reason
  
• Wizard duels are now called pray-offs

I’ll add more when i read more

more

• Harry converts Draco into being a Gryffindor (who are depicted as pitch perfect Christians who follow the bible closely and only take orders from God)
  
• Eco friendly-ness is bad apparently
  
• Voldemort has hair
  
• Believing in evolution is apparently Satanic
  
• Voldemort wanted to make Christianity ILLEGAL
  
• Voldemort ALSO has a Reddit account
  
• Dumbledore calls Reddit a “godless coven”
  
• THEY LITERALLY TRY AND CONVERT VOLDEMORT INTO BEING A CHRISTIAN
  
• Harry says that Voldemort has been tricked by the lies of society and that he deserves to burn in hell 
  
• ““I’m just so upset that you don’t accept the Bible,” Hermionie sobbed femininely. “The Bible is the best book ever. Why can’t you respect that?”“
  
• Voldemort is described as a fornicating, drug-addicted evolutionist (Actually, this is what the author says that all Evolutionists are like this)
  

I can’t believe i found a fic to rival My Immortal

This is some anti My Immortal shit

how does one sob femininely? 

PLEASE SOMEONE SEND ME A NAME OR A LINK TO THIS

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10644439/1/Hogwarts-School-of-Prayer-and-Miracles

I love you thank you

Dumbledore is married to McGonagall.

There are several paragraphs describing beloved fictional characters’ chest hair.

Slytherins are Catholics.

Petunia wears pant suits.

“Aunt Petunia smacked her hands over Harry’s young ears; and her voice was sickly sweet when she said, “Thank you very much for your concern, sir, but he does not need your religion, he has science and socialism and birthdays. “

Reblog if you don’t need religion because you have science socialism and birthdays

warmpockets:

warmpockets:

i’m watching an art theft documentary and they’re interviewing this art history professor from new york who was asked to go with the fbi to authenticate a rubens that had been stolen but it was a sting operation so they had to pretend like they weren’t the fbi, that they were some private buyer about to pay $3.5 million for it, and the fbi was like “this is a VERY delicate operation because you never know how they will react to what you have to say so let the agent do all of the talking, don’t say a word to anyone just nod if it’s the rubens, the last operation we did the guy in your position got shot because things went wrong in a second” and then it cuts to the professor’s interview and he says “i wasn’t going to fly down to miami to be a part of an undercover fbi sting operation to handle what could be rubens’s aurora and just NOT say anything. i was gonna have to ad lib a little” and then he tells the interviewer that when he & the fbi agent got to the hotel while he was examining the painting he started lecturing the other people, first on how badly they had wrapped it, and then about like how it had been painted, the history of it, what the subject was and what she was doing, etc etc, and he was like “i hadn’t taught a class on rubens in 15 years, so for me it was like being back in the classroom except my students couldn’t leave” 

at one point during the deal the professor turned to the woman selling it and he said “isn’t this just the most beautiful rubens you’ve ever seen outside of a museum?” (because the fbi had told him earlier that this piece had been stolen from a museum) and THEN he said “where on earth did you get it from?” and the group of people the woman had with her was like taxidermy-fox.png but the woman was like “inheritance” can you IMAGINE the fbi agent about to have a fucking aneurysm when this random guy you’ve brought in just to nod if it’s the right painting not only starts giving an impromptu lecture but then he asks how they got it

queerwatsons:

me: im begging u i need to study

my brain: did you hear the word? whAT’s the word? hE’s a-coming. wHO’s a-coming? paUL’s a-coming. PAUL’S A-coming??

tomatomagica:

this will happen to you if you sexualize minors

dailydungeondelves:

It’s hard to replace something so awesome…

somerandompokemon:

unfortunatelysirius:

sweetmadameblue:

theouijagirl:

kerplunkers:

hypo-thermic:

yogaboi:

toocooltobehipster:

To donate £5 to the charity supporting the male victims of domestic abuse, text the message: MKDV46 to 70070

Click here to watch the video

At first I though this was a joke

Don’t ignore this Tumblr

Yet they still do even when it’s right in their face.

This reminds me of how a friend of mine was abused by the mother of his child. She was mentally unstable and used to berate him constantly and would smack him in the head all the time. It really pissed me off. Then one night she threw hot coffee in his face and tried to stab him with a screwdriver. The cops hauled him off to jail because she made up a sob story that painted herself as the victim. 

Once he left her, he stayed with me and it was a nightmare. She stalked him and me. She would drive by my house obsessively at all hours of the day and night (her muffler made a weird sound so I know it was her). She started showing up at my job, showing up at the places I frequented around town, and filling up my voicemail with dead air. The cops were no help.

One day she got bold enough to talk her way into my home by conning my elderly grandmother, whom I was taking care of, while I was out. She went in my room and went through my stuff (creepy), then found him napping on the couch and attacked him. My grandmother witnessed the whole thing. He grabbed her by the arms, forced her out the front door, and locked it. The cops were called again. They said they’d go and ‘talk’ to her.

The next day we were watching a movie and there was a knock at the door. The police had come to arrest him. She filed a complaint against him and shown off some bruises on her arms from the altercation that she swore were completely unprovoked. My grandmother saw the whole thing since she was in the living room too and testified on his behalf. He still ended up serving jail time.
No one takes male domestic violence victims seriously. They only see males as perpetrators.

#standing up for male victims takes NOTHING away from female victims #this isn’t an either/or scenario #you can pursue justice for male victims and still be 100% feminist #safer world for EVERYONE 

This is important. Just… everyone needs to see this.

No one should suffer abuse. But when I look at this I see that men are taking this abuse as well. And no one is helping. To anyone who thinks that’s a joke, stop thinking so or- get out. OUT.

littlemonarch:

baker-p-i:

pseudo-seraphim:

somewhere-inthe-deepdetails:

nikadd:

a-them-fatale:

laughconfetti:

proto-homo:

xelamanrique318:

SNL - Cut for Time: My Little Step Children

WHY WOULD THEY CUT THIS?????

This is legiterally the funniest thing snl has done in decades

they cut it because of the ONE gay reference

Same energy

both of these sketches were written by julio torres - here’s his twitter

Omg 😂

I just want you all to know that my dramatic 6 year old ass would have loved all of this shit.

I’m the dramatique™ hand to face moment in the broken mirror.

“YOU HAVE EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING IS FOR YOU. AND THIS ONE THING IS FOR HIM.”

I don’t know Julio Torres nor his sexual orientation but no matter what it is he has lived The Queer Experience™ .